Twisted Tuesday’s Fetish: Orgasm Control
I’m proud to offer another wonderful addition to our recent line-up of real fetish interviews on folks who enjoy BDSM. RS is a deliciously kinky woman who enjoys being consensually dominated in her relationship with her partner, who is also her Master. She agreed to be interviewed about conditioning, especially orgasm conditioning. To learn more about this fascinating kink, read on! As always, our interviews aren’t a how-to, but rather a glimpse into the explicit lives of our kinky neighbors and friends!
Please tell us, what is your fetish?
My biggest fetish right now is conditioning. My Master even pointed this out to me the other day. I love working with him to condition me to have certain responses to him. The first thing he worked on was orgasm control. When he says the word cum, I am to have an orgasm. Now I don’t have earth shattering orgasms each and every time, but he does expect a decent one. And he has achieved this by making sure that I am wet when I see him.
How common do you think your fetish is?
The orgasm control is fairly common among those in the Dominant role of a relationship. Conditioning in general is also common, sometimes equating pain and pleasure (we do this as well).
Does your fetish, or the people who participate in it, have any catchy titles?
Well I’m part of a M/s relationship, that is Master/slave. However, there is no catchy title, just orgasm control or conditioning.
How do you incorporate your fetish into your sexual experiences?
Yes, intrinsically it is. He likes to hit me and engauge my masochistic side, and then step back and command me to orgasm. Generally he will do it with little to no sexual contact now, but when we first started it was usually accompanied by fingering. He also likes to torture me and have me orgasm in public settings, knowing that I’m not always quiet.
Is there anything you have to be particularly careful about with this fetish? If so, how do you handle it?
I have to be careful not to fake it! Kidding of course, I don’t fake it. If it’s not satisfactory to him, then he’ll generally do something to make it. This usually involves hair pulling, some sort of nipple torture, or a slap on the thigh depending on the setting.
What really works for you about this fetish, what aspects turn you on?
Control, I love knowing that he can do that to me with just his words.
Would you please tell us a story or two about sexual experiences you’ve had involving your fetish?
This all started because I didn’t believe that he could do this to me. At the time we were living a few hundred miles apart, so he told me to turn on my webcam. He proceeded to tell me dirty things and instructed me to do as he wished. When I was close to orgasm, he growled at me to cum. A year and a half later, and I’m all his.
How do people react when you share your fetish with them, if anyone knows?
Some are shocked or amazed if they see it happen, and ask him how it’s possible. It’s not really something we broadcast about ourselves.
How do you go about finding partners that share your interest?
Well I was lucky, I was interested in a man who introduced me to this and unfolded my desire for it. I think his next project is to make sure that I’m always wet and ready in his presence.
Can you recommend any resources for people who want to learn more or might even share your fetish?
BDSM 101 by Jay Wiseman, The New Topping Book, or Screw the Roses, Send me the Thorns are excellent introductory books that deal with D/s relationships.
Anything else you would like to add?
I love my life, but it’s not for everyone. And the orgasm control took over a year to accomplish, mostly because I really really wanted it. Pushing someone to do this will only end in frustration.
RS, thank you so much for sharing a bit about your relationship and fetish with us! We wish you and your Master all the best. If anyone would like to contact RS they may email me at ExploringIntimacy (at) Gmail (dot) com – and I will forward all respectful letters on to her. We’ll be back next Tuesday with a fresh Fetish interview. Many thanks to all of you who have participated and are eagerly awaiting to see yours in print!